The Ultimate Gift

The phone rang and the caller ID let it know it was my eldest daughter.  “ Hey,” I answered, “What’s up?” She replied, “Mom, Mother’s Day is coming, what do you want?  What do you want from all of us?  Need anything?”  My response, “Hmmm let me think about it.

How do you respond when someone asks, “What do you want?”  

Do you respond with boldness knowing exactly what you want and not being afraid to ask for it?  

Do you shy away from the question and say, “Oh, anything you give me will be just fine.”  

Then praying secretly you do get something you can use and not something you will have to hide away until the person who gave you the gift comes to visit?

In a culture where we are taught ambiguity, don’t make waves, go with the flow, it can be so challenging to stop and be okay with sharing what we truly want.  

Sharing with others what we truly want allows them to get to know us better.  It is actually very kind to share with others what you want especially when they ask. 

What they are saying is:  “Tell me more about you.  If I know what you love then I can truly meet your needs and we all succeed.”  

Responding with a cover up actually makes it difficult for someone to get to know you. 

They are now playing a guessing game and hoping for the best.  Praying that what they got you is really pleasing to you, not a game of cat and mouse and not being honest with one another for fear of hurting one’s feelings.

Ambiguity does not lead to authenticity.  

Authenticity builds trust and helps us to succeed with one another.  

This year I challenge you to get down and dirty with yourself and ask yourself: 

What do I really really want this year? 

Is it a vacation with family?  

Maybe a new stove?  

Perhaps a day with loved ones that is way over do?  

I believe we have been taught over the years to not value our needs for fear we will seem high minded, arrogant or conceited.  

That couldn’t be further than the truth.  To really state what we want makes us vulnerable.  

It opens us up to possible criticism, rejection, ridicule, but on the other hand it opens us up to connection.  

True connection in which you say, “ This is who I am and these are my desires”. Now the person you are connecting with doesn’t need to guess.  

If they truly love you they will go the extra mile to meet your needs.

In response to my daughter’s question three days later I responded, “I’d like a summer purse, one that looks like this: picture included and because I love to journal, tell your siblings I want each one of them to pick out a journal that they think I would love”.  They knew they couldn’t fail, I love all kinds of journals!

Coolest thing ever, they all put a lot of thought into their purchases and the journals were a combination of each child’s love and my love.  

Below is a picture of my Mother’s Day gifts.  It was truly one of my best Mother’s Day gifts ever, for I received the desires of my heart from the people I love.

The next time someone says, “ What do you want?”  

Be brave enough to be bold and answer with sincerity and honesty.  Even if it turns out differently than expected you can be proud of you for sharing who you truly are with another.